Time And Tide

Yesterday is not ours to recover, but tomorrow is ours to win or to lose. Lyndon B.Johnson

Thursday, August 28, 2003

So I'm running around the house all week like a chicken with it's head cut off just doing my best to be caught up here so I can be packed and ready to leave for Florida (at 5am Saturday morning). Upstairs has piles of laundry waiting, in spite of the fact that I've done two freaking loads a day EVERY BLESSED DAY this week already. The floors need mopped and I'm almost out of guinea pig food, which means the little buggers will likely starve before we get home because Doug will never get time to make the piggy food run while working doubles every day (more on why he's not going later).

So what do I do?

I went to Lowes and bought yard toys. Power tool yard toys. And today must be my lucky day because it was 12 months no interest day. I went in to get stuff to reconnect our dryer vent so it wouldn't be blowing out into the basement and came out with a gas powered hedge trimmer, a tree limber attachment thingy (looks like a big sawsall) for the weedeater and a shop vac for the basement, stuff to fix the gap in the fence and a gas line for the weedeater so I can run all that cool stuff. I've spent the evening trimming hedges out front and boy are my arms tired. I have to be loaded up tomorrow and I have yet to pack bath stuff. It's the way I work...what can I say.

I'm a fool for tools.

Actually, I think I may be putting off packing because I'm not looking forward to going since I have to hit the road with 3 kids and no husband. My pop is going to drive our van, but still. We seldom get week long vacations and I'm more than a little bit disappointed that I won't get to spend our first in two years with him. It isn't that I think we won't have fun, because I'm sure we will, but I'd rather do it with him there. There's just no way though so he will be stuck at home, living the single life, messing up my house (which will surely be clean by tomorrow) and probably considering it a vacation of a different kind. I don't want to go without him.

Sigh...sitting here is't accomplishing any of the big work that's waiting and I want to fire up that hedge trimmer (have two hollys to even up) before it gets dark and laundry still awaits. There's that dryer vent that I originally started out to fix still needing done too. More tools. Yay!

Wednesday, August 27, 2003

She stood in the door of my bedroom. "I was just reading another chapter in my book and I want to read you something. It's very sad." I tried to resist the urge to roll my eyes at her attempt to avoid bedtime. It had been a busy night. Open house at school kept us out until past 9:00 and the time since getting home had been rushed to fit in baths and getting things ready for tomorrow's school day. "You need to be in bed. You'll never manage to get ready on time if you don't get to sleep, like, a long time ago." I tried to explain. Bedtime is always so difficult, except with my oldest, and I think she's just figured out she can go to bed at 9 and pretend that she's asleep.

Emily's big blue eyes peeked out from behind the cover of the book. She took one deep breath, as if to sound exasporated with me, and started to read slowly. I dropped my pen beside the journal in my lap and rested my head against the stack of pillows I was leaning against. I lamented the fact that I lose battles like this so easily (and so often) as I listened to her tell of Stinky and his mother crossing the road. "Stinky stood as if paralyzed." she read, "The sound of the car that approached him and the sight of it held his gaze and he stood not knowing what to do. His eyes were big as saucers and his heart raced as the car bore down on him, yet still, he could not move." I couldn't see Em's face behind the book she held in front of her, but I heard her voice change. She stood as if she was made of stone. She spoke as if she might be suffocating, her voice rasping and low. I knew what was coming, of course, but I watched, transfixed, as if she were a television.

"Stinky's mother pushed him out of the way just in time. But it was too late for her. She was dead" She read Stinky's next line ("MOOOOOMMM!") as if she were Stinky in the book and not an 8 year-old reading from a book. The book fell from where she held it so high in front of herself, and I saw her sweet little face twisted with the pain of heartbreak. She dropped the book onto the couch as she ran across the room to me. "Oh mommy isn't that the saddest thing ever!" she cried as she dropped her head onto my shoulders. I cried too - not for Stinky and his mother, but for my baby with the tender heart.

I'm the same way, you know. I know that she will always remember this passage from this book and how it affected her, just as I remember how much it hurt me when Nester crawled from beneath the warmth of his mother and found that she had died protecting him from the freezing snow. When she asked if she could sleep in our room on the couch, I couldn't say no. Her covers shook with each deep snub and sniffle as she tried to go to sleep and I had to cry again.

Tuesday, August 26, 2003

I just don't have much luck with my posts being saved. Already this morning I had one ready to go but did it post? No way. That would have been too easy. Who knows what blogger decides to do with my stuff. Wonder what I did that pissed off the blogger god.

Oh well. Will try again later when I have time.

Sunday, August 24, 2003

SPITOONO

I've spent the bigger part of the last 5 days working on our computer. Last Wednesday night my husband woke me from a sound sleep to tell me he thought he just killed the computer. It wouldn't turn on. It was officially dead. I am finally able to sit down in front of a practically new system and just rest. No more frustration.

Feels good.

Friday night we loaded the kids into the car, grabbed dinner at Subway and headed out to Spitoono. It's an annual event put on by the Redneck Performing Arts Association to raise funds for charity. Sponsored by, staffed by and attended by rednecks from all over the area. Free admission, live bands playing music until the wee hours. For 3 long days Spitoono goes on rain or shine. Peopls show up for the free entertainment, but they drink plenty of beer, play games and buy t-shirts (each year artfully and interestingly designed), or eat, all for charity. We have some of the best local bands around. Friday night, we arrived early enough to see three bands perform.

My favorite band is The Deadly Crank Dogs. I can remember when my husband and I first started dating and he asked me out to see them play. When I heard the band's name I started tossing out other possible plans. Truthfully it didn't sound very promising, and knowing he was into all kinds of techno music, I didn't think I'd enjoy them. Was I wrong. They play great music, songs I know, and they are most entertaining to watch...especially Raoul (he plays bongos). We were happy to find that they would be playing Friday night so we made sure to stick around until they did. The kids loved them. Jake and Emily danced and ran around until they were about ready to fall over dead from exhaustion. Of course, by the end of the evening Jake managed to gather enough energy to run around picking up beer cans and trash that was left on the ground by negligent rednecks. People sitting around us got a kick out of watching him pick up trash. Jake is a bit anal about trash left on the ground. I had one man ask if I rented Jake out for events. We all had a great time.

I've read a lot this week while I've sat here waiting for the computer to scan and install things. Last night I finished reading Wild Orchids by Jude Deveraux. I cried all the way through the first section on Ford. I was disappointed that Jackie's sections didn't seem as good as his were. And the ending was way too rushed after all the excellent building of the story. It began intensely emotional, got eerily interesting, turned plumb spooky, then whoosh it was over. What's up with that? I also finished reading Good in Bed by Jennifer W. (can't remember how to spell her last name...too lazy to look) It turned kind of weird in the end but it was a great read. Interesting thing...4 out of 4 books I've read since Wednesday, were written in first person. I can't help but wonder what I would read if I was still the type that refused to read a first person book at all. For many years I wouldn't...they seemed to lack to much set up, they weren't as visually pleasing to read as others. Another interesting note is that every last one of the books had a main character that was a writer. I kept getting hung up on that. I can imagine that as a writer, it would be easier to write a character who also writes, but come on! 4 out of 4 books? And all in first person? What are the odds? I enjoyed them all though and if I can make myself get into it enough, I plan to read Dirty Girls Social Club next. I've been struggling with the first two pages all day though. It just isn't drawing me in.

Oh well, reading will come later as now it is time to rest my overtaxed brain. I'm glad the computer problems are finally worked out. I dread having to talk with the computer people tomorrow to return the second motherboard and processor that wouldn't work (we had already received one bad one) and having to try to get them to replace the gig of RAM that motherboard ruined. The stuff is expensive though and they tested it when they were trying to show me that the first board wasn't bad when I told them it was. Hopefully I'll be able to hold out and win :)

Monday, August 18, 2003

I blogged Friday, really I did but I clicked on an email link and it changed my page. Of course blogger asked me if I wanted to save my post. Whew, I thought, at least I won't lose everything I just typed. I have no idea where it was saved though (and it's looking like it wasn't actually saved) so there went that.

The rest of the weekend was just too full to allow time for sitting at the computer. Saturday morning we took off to get haircuts. Leirin needed a haircut and there's only one person I'd trust to do it. Joann cut my hair for 16 years before I moved here. She knew my hair, how it grew, it's evil tendencies, and she kept me looking good in spite of them. She also has an appreciation for long hair and understands what "just an inch" means. - no needless hacking by her hands. It was great to see her again. She even took the time to have a look at my god awful haircut I got about a month ago and fixed it up for me. I no longer have child bangs that wrap around half my head. I do, however, have curls...tons and tons of curls that I thought I'd outgrew about the time I left elementary school.

They're baaaack.

Yesterday dh spent several hours on the roof cleaning out gutters and trying to repair one that had broke away from the house during a particularly rough storm last week. The repair job was a bust...no ladder tall enough to let him fix it and we didn't have the right stuff for it anyway. While he worked on the roof, I worked outside in the yard so if he fell I would at least hear him scream. It makes me nervous for him to be two stories off the ground and walking on a steep, wet roof. It all went well though except for the heat. We both came in feeling quite ill and accomplished little for the rest of the day.
The gutters are clean and our rosemary bush is free of stray blackberry vines. Thank goodness...I'm about to get tired of doing battle with those things. Every time I go out to weed I wonder why the unwanted things grow so vigorously and I have to battle to keep anything I want to have in the yard alive. It's just not fair.

While I rested I finished reading Jewels Of The Sun by Nora Roberts. I enjoyed it very much. I started on Lisa Gardner's The Perfect Husband immediately after. It's beginning to get intense and though I've read better, I like it too. I think the characters have acted, well, a bit out of character in a couple of places. Beyond that, it's an excellent story. But hey, I can be entertained by cereal box backs and toilet paper wrappers so I enjoy most books I read at least to some degree.

Today begins another week of school. It was difficult to drag the sleepy girls from their beds this morning and Emily forgot her bottle of juice when she walked out the door to catch the bus. Nothing ever goes off without a hitch here. I should be used to it. Jake's school is going well. He is so excited about what he is learning. I think it's because his reading is going so well. I've worried myself near to death over whether I would have it in me to teach him to read. It's been the thing that's bothered me most. If I fail at that there is no way I can successfully teach him any of the other things. But he's coming along quite nicely with his reading and it makes me proud of both of us.

And speaking of school, it's time to get busy. It's a lame blogging day anyway. Maybe I will have more interesting things to say after more coffee.

Wednesday, August 13, 2003

I just put the girls on the bus (at 7:15 oh my). Already this morning I've cleaned my living room carpet, walked the puppy twice, fed and watered various pets and brushed my hair. Brushing my hair don't really count though because since I washed it last night all brushing it served to do is poof it out. I now sport a style similar to that Flashdance girl, ewwey! I'll have to fix that, but later, right now I just want to rest with coffee. It's too dang early to do any more than I've already done.

Last night I watched Queer eye for the straight guy again with my husband. Definitely hooked. The Fab 5 are so clued in. In fact, every gay man I've ever known is. They actually care about color and impressions, hygiene, shopping, talking, feelings...sigh. Seriously, I'd love to have a gay man on the side.

Onward...

It seems fashion (or lack of it) is a hot topic in the little circle of blogs I read. I don't think I have a style. I used to, but that was back in the day when I was young and hot (and my budget consisted of money for clothing rather than bills) and now I'm not. In the summer I used to only wear white. No joke. I had an entire white summer wardrobe of nothing but whites and the occasional barely there color. Light, airy, flowing and fluttering (but never frilly...I don't do frilly). I could do fitted or loose and make it look good. Short skirts with lacy socks and heels...could do that. Jeans with heels or pointy-toed black lace covered boots...could do that too. Tank top and a worn out pair of boys Levi's? Yep, did it well. Now I hardly think I could have a style, even with the help of the Fab 5 or the women's equivalent.

I live most of my life in jeans and t-shirts or sweats and t-shirts depending on the time of year. Seldom will you catch me in a sweater (too itchy) and almost never will I wear heels. I don't own a bra. I prefer tanks and microfiber sports bra type things if I really must wear a bra and granny panties have overthrown the thong and string bikini's in the battle for my butt. I am comfort oriented now. Besides, I seldom see people so why dress for it? I mean, how much fashion sense is required for laundry, vacuuming and scooping litter boxes? I may occasionally look "stylish" but if it happens, it's purely accidental (and comfortable). Besides, clothes today suck. It's the 70's all over again. Anyone who grew up wearing coulottes and double zippered bell-bottomed blue jeans knows it was a mistake the first time around. 70's fashion is a nightmare. I can't even watch a movie set in the 70's.

It's been this fashion trend that's given me much grief as I prepared the girls for going back to school. Our county dress code states that shorts and skirts must reach to at within an inch above the knee. Have school district officials failed to notice the clothes that are being sold? I have news for them...shorts like that are called Jams and they went out in the 80's. Now the skirt length issue I agree with completely, but there's nothing wrong with shorts that hit mid-thigh.
Go shopping now and what you'll find is low-riding hot pant short shorts and women's t-shirts small enough to fit your average 6 year-old.

On the first day of school my oldest said most girls were wearing capri's. The most laughable of the dress code rules is "no headbands". They already covered do rags, bandanas, hats and various other forms of headgear and they specifically mention headbands. This morning Leirin came in and said "Do you think it's ok if I wear this hairbow?" and I have to wonder what is going on in the world when a hairbow becomes a main focus of preparing for school. It is a hair band with feathers hanging off of beaded leather strips. Honestly, I don't know if they will deem that "unsuitable" or not. It's entirely possible.

Monday, August 11, 2003

Today we start a new school year. Leirin will begin Jr High and Em's starting 3rd grade. Jake's in 1st but since we started his school nearly a month ago it's all old hat to him. I'm always amazed with the furor with which we attack a new year. Look at me...it's 5:45 now and I've been up for over an hour. The dogs have been out (one of them twice), I've washed and dried a load of clothes, I'm dressed, the hair is done, I have on shoes...what's up with that? It happens every year and it lasts for all of a week. If we're lucky. Come next Monday I'll be lucky to have dragged my tired old butt out of bed by 7:15 and we'll have to hit the floor running just to make it anywhere on time. I know the pattern. I just can't break it.

Yesterday I worked hard in the house hoping to get up today with a minimal amount of work to be done because a) I'm ready for the little bit of a break that having two of three kids gone all day will afford me, b) Jake and I have big things planned for his school this week now that we won't be working around other people to distract us from school, and c) I just like the idea of being caught up every now and again. So I worked feverishly all day long cleaning, dusting, putting away. At 9:30pm when the kids had been tucked in bed (knowing, of course, that they probably wouldn't stay) I was getting ready to settle in for a bit of relaxing when I hear Doug practically scream from our bedroom. Seems he worked Calliope into a fine frenzy and she got too happy and peed on our bed covers. At this point I was exhausted. In spite of him being home all day, he had only taken the dogs out twice, the compost bucket (which I had asked if he'd empty after dinner) was still sitting on the kitchen table near the door smelling impatient, the desk I had dusted a total of two times already was littered with ashes (there isn't an ashtray big enough for him) and bottle caps. Now I had to strip and remake a bed.

I did what any well-bred southern girl would have done in my position. I threw a hissy fit. It wasn't even about the dog and her happy bladder, at this point, it was all about me. And them. I had worked hard to try to get ahead. I had sat down exactly long enough to eat two meals, and watch the last half hour of Lost In Space while I caught my breath. Out of the entire day, I sat for a total of *maybe* an hour. Leirin had a friend over. Doug and Jake spent about 8 hours on the computer playing the new Morrowind I had to run pick up Saturday because they had left the other one out of the case and it got scratched and wouldn't work.

I love my family, I really do, but sometimes I seriously doubt you could find a bunch of lazier and more spoiled people anywhere on the planet. I have a house full of people who apparently don't know where to find a trash CAN much less clean bags for one. Having never put away a pair of shoes in their lives, it's no wonder that when I do put them away and they need them, they have to ask because they would never consider that they might be in the closet where they belong. And granted, my husband did get up and cut grass first thing. But that was all he did. And I'd had to ask. So I raised hell. I had a tantrum. It was pathetic.

My poor husband was brave. He appeared to even get my point. And he was kind enough not to laugh at me when at one point I had got so *in* to the tirade I said something like - "...and everyone thinks I'm being mean because I ask them to do things, which they DON'T do. Everybody wants the puppy. Everybody's going to do this and do that, but you've been home all day and how many times have you taken him out or opened the door to let the other dogs into the back yard? Be honest about it (it was twice btw and I asked both times). And it pisses me off that I'm working my ass off to allow a 5th dog to fit in this house because you wanted him so much. I'm the one that does *everything* for him and the little bugger loves YOU!" Ok, I said it was pathetic.

In other news, the kids and I spent the day on Saturday shopping for the last few things needed for school. The girls at work had said Penneys would probably have the shorts we needed (our dress code says they can't be shorter than one inch above the knee - I won't even go *there* today). What luck we had there. It was a huge sale, a sale to end all sales with bargains galore. Clearance racks spread out all over the store with big signs that said 50% off 70% off...and we loaded up. At one point I was carrying around so many clothes that a nice cashier lady came over and offered to take them to the register and hold them there for me. Whew, my arms were about to break and I was so grateful. In the end I blew the budget and spent 262.00 on our new clothes but even the hubby couldn't complain when we figured out the total ticket price if they hadn't been on sale would have been nearly 600 bucks! Even I got new clothes and I can seldom afford to do that when having to shop for the kids.

Well I just put my girls on the school bus. Today is Leirin's first day in Jr. High and Em's first day at school without big sister somewhere nearby. I don't know who was most nervous. It's done now and I won't see them again to hear about their days until 3 when they return. I keep wondering if life will slow down for me a bit since it will only be me and Jake at home, or if we will still find ourselves continuing at this same fast pace. I'm hoping for a little bit slower and more relaxed. Time will tell. I miss the girls already. I've grown used to having them home most of the time since school let out for the summer. But they get bored and as much as they insist they aren't ready to return to school when the time rolls around, I think they are.

Speaking of returning to school. I need to wake Jake so we can start our day too.

Friday, August 08, 2003

Well here I am, behind again on posting. Now, not only can I not keep up with laundry, mopping, ironing (yes, I have to occasionally) and dusting, but I fall behind in blogging too. Shameful.

I've been having one of those days today. I went down to the kitchen when I got up this morning and flipped the coffee pot on then took the puppy out for his morning walk. I returned to a counter, drawer and floor covered in coffee and the pot was empty. Great. So I clean that mess up and start another pot which I decide I will sit and watch - my coffee pot has developed this habit and I'm planning to get a new one but dh has me waiting on a catalog from his coffee supplier where I can get a 200.00 coffee pot for about 80 bucks that does all that cool stuff like froth milk and make espresso and cappuccino's. So the coffee pot is dripping right along while I work in the kitchen. This time (smart me) I'm staying close by so that I can watch it. Suffice it to say that I'm not that alert until AFTER I've had my cup of coffee in the morning so the coffee covers the counter and is preparing to run off into the floor before I notice.

Now, not only is it a pisser to have to clean up TWO pots of coffee from all over the place without ever having had a cup to drink, but it's even more aggravating to have the thing with so much hot water spilling out from here there and yonder that I can't even pick it up to slam it into the trash or toss it into the yard. I have to start my day with Type-2 caffine (that wonderfully heavily sugared and caffinated Coke) much earlier than normal and it just screws up my whole day. Just call me Grumpy.

I'm still working on the bottle of Coke and still only half awake and it's nearly 5:30pm at this point. This morning's load of laundry is still in the dryer and I have yet to vacuum the living room. I want that new coffee pot NOW!

Gimli, the now permanent puppy, is napping in front of the a/c vent because you know how hot it gets in the south and he's exhausted from chewing pig ears all day. The kids are playing on their computers and I've been spending time here trying to figure out how to move my blog to my website (something I suck at when I'm at my best...why I attempted to figure it out without any coffee in me today is beyond me). My neck hurts and I have no book to read and hubby is working a double tonight. Woe is me.

Without much coherency, here's what's going on in my little corner of the world...

We're still waiting to get pathology results from my mom's surgery. School starts on Monday for the girls and that means Jake and I will also begin a much heavier schedule than we've been following for the last several weeks. Leirin worked on the farm today even though her last day was supposed to be yesterday. She just wasn't ready to be done with it yet so she showed up again this morning. I'm still so impressed with her.

After figuring out my Lowes card is nearly paid off I've decided to do the living room floor as soon as possible. I'm lusting over Pergo after seeing how well Linda's floor turned out but I've not been lucky enough to find any marked down prices on the boxes at my store. I'm checking other options. Whatever it is it has to be able to hold up to a LOT of punishment. I'm not sure what that would be (besides concrete). Perhaps inspiration will strike soon and maybe it will come with a clearance price.

One can only hope.

Tuesday, August 05, 2003

I'm playing catch up this morning because I've accomplished less than nothing over the weekend (including yesterday). My mom's surgery went well even though the surgeon had to remove more mass than she originally thought she'd have to. It went well though and not once did she take a pain pill. She said she didn't have any pain - it was sore, but not painful. So Friday night she comes out of the bathroom and says, "Where did you get the kids laundry hamper?" It's a colorful canvas bag that sits on a wooden rack/frame thingy. "Wal-Mart." (where else) "They had them on clearance." Long story short she wanted to go get one for her house and so we spent the whole day Saturday - less than 24 hours after surgery - shopping.
The hospital had called to check on her and my brother's response was "Well she must be pretty good, she's been shopping all day." She spent the weekend with us and she's home now. Today she's going with my grandma for her eye surgery. Cataracts.

I haven't accomplished anything this morning. I'm searching for dog commands in another language. The kids try to be helpful and help train him and, though I appreciate their entheusiasm, they render every command I know useless. The dog's name is Gimli, by the way. My husband cared not for any name I suggested, but when my brother threw the name Gimli out as he read The two Towers, my husband jumped on it. Oh well, at least everyone can remember it, and the pup knows it too. Saturday I bought several types of treats that I thought I could use for training. The last ones I bought were too hard for the tiny puppy teeth Gimli is equipped with. It wasn't long before I had helpful training volunteers lined up to give commands. Emily decided to "test" the treats (being helpful) so she laid out a sample buffet to see which was liked best. Now I have 3 dogs with the runs and no treats to train with.

The other language commands was the best idea I could come up with. Let's see the kids mess with that. Only problem is I don't know any other languages and I'm finding that there's something seriously wrong with French (German, Gaelic, etc) spoken with a deep southern accent. Luckily, in Gaelic, the command for sit is Suidh (pronounced Soo-ee) That one, I might could get away with - though people might think it's odd using a pig call on a dog.

Back to the drawing board.

So we're shopping with my mom on Saturday and Emily sees those "Fur Real" pets and decides whe wants nothing in the world more than to spend 30 bucks on this cat that looks like the real thing. What? "Em, (I said) we already have NINE "for real" cats at home." Dang thing even sheds. How's that for getting your money's worth?